When someone is bothering me
I say “U+202e”
Which makes their speech look
Like some gobbledegook
Which it is, to be fair, usually.
Wednesday, 21 November 2012
Tuesday, 20 November 2012
I go round breaking mirrors for fun
It’s smashing in more ways than one!
When I reflect
On my failures inept
I can blame ’em on bad luck – job done.
Friday, 16 November 2012
A spider-made suit – just my luck
It sounds good, but boy did it suck.
The jacket was wearable
The pants, though, were terrible—
The flies just kept on getting stuck.
Thursday, 15 November 2012
There once was a man in a boat
Who said: “It’s just me and my goat.
How pleasant to swoon
On a hot afternoon
Afloat, with a goat, in my boat.”
Tuesday, 13 November 2012
It’s pretty cool getting to know
How these space up-goers up-go
And if tech makes you queasy,
Relax! It's quite easy —
It’s not rocket science, you... D’oh!
When predicting unlikely events
False positives give an immense
Skew to any data
So best wait till later
Before you get coaxed off the fence.
Monday, 12 November 2012
Poll happiness or poll dejection?
The smallest things have a connection,
But to get miles ahead
With your foe left for dead
You’d do worse than win the election.
A wannabe star in LA
Shamefacedly skipped town one day
And while he would claim
That he’d never sought fame
His cell number gave him away.
Whether living in mansion or hovel
You're probably reading this novel
About a hot chick
Who clicks with a dick
Cause she digs the way he makes her grovel.
Thursday, 8 November 2012
Hasn't XKCD been political lately?
This fixation on US politics has been the reason behind my non-posting. Try as I might, I have nothing to say about the history of the US Senate and/or House of Representatives, whether as a limerick, short story, radio play, graphic novel or anything else.
Instead, I'm hoping you can accept a limerick I've written about the current hot-potato political issue that's got us all abuzz here in Britain. With that out of the way and the blockage cleared, I ought then to be able to catch up with the rest of them before too long. So, take it away Nadine.
There was an MP, Nadine Dorries
Who went to eat grubs in the forest.
Her scheme was hare-brained —
She should have remained
London-bound and got grubby with Boris.