Monday, 28 February 2011

Comic 866 - Compass and Straightedge

There once was a boy from the Peaks
Who mastered construction techniques
But his compass-and-straight
Couldn't make him a mate -
He bisected alone in the Peaks.

Original comic here.

Another curiously sad limerick, but one that nicely recalls some of the earliest examples of the form. If you would like to see other limericks that follow similarly antediluvian conventions, you can use the tags 'There Once Was' and 'Same word in first and last lines' below this post.

Comic 865 - Nanobots

This nanobot apocalypse
Is bad, but we've not had our chips
Just yet. They'll all freeze
Once they're out of IPs -
They shouldn't have stayed on v6!

Original comic here.

Wednesday, 23 February 2011

A long weekend

Hello, readers.

I am going away to spend a few days visiting my old friend the man from the Wick (who said "tick a tick, tick a tick"). That means that the next post or two will come late, but be assured that normal service will be resumed soon.

Comic 864 - Flying Cars

OK, we're not living on Mars
And we don't zip round in flying cars
But at least now we know
Calls without video
Mean that girls are just wearing their bras.

Original comic here.

Monday, 21 February 2011

Comic 863 - Major in the Universe

To see how the cosmos conspires
And interacts - this he desires
As his major; I think
He just wants to drink
And sit round reading Blink and Outliers.

Original comic here.

Friday, 18 February 2011

Comic 862 - Let Go

These websites I used to endorse
Have got worse than charlie or horse.
That's enough. I've a view ta
Turn off my computer
And simply rely on the Force.

Original comic here.

Thursday, 17 February 2011

Classic Comic 807 - Connected

The least common ground seems gigantic
When lovers are young, free and frantic
But I'm old and jaded,
The lustre has faded
And none of it seems that romantic.

Original comic here.

A rather despondent limerick for a rather desolate comic, mercifully withheld until a little while after St Valentine's Day.

Wednesday, 16 February 2011

Comic 861 - Wisdom Teeth

A bored convalescent from Baden
Rang his gamer friend up and sought pardon
But, feeling quite woozy
(The anaesthetic's a doozy)
He played Minecraft like a Zen garden.

Original comic here.

Monday, 14 February 2011

Comic 860 - Never Do This

A fun, pocket-sized microscope
Makes pencils and quarters look dope
But look under your nails
And the fun quickly fails -
You'll want to abandon all hope.

Original comic here.

Saturday, 12 February 2011

Classic comic 285 - Wikipedian Protester

A wiki-man felt a vocation
To clamp down on public oration.
When speakers lacked rigour
He heckled with vigour:
"Hey buddy, you need a citation!"

Original comic here.

Friday, 11 February 2011

Comic 859 - (

Whenever I open a bracket
I know I can serve you a packet
Of unresolved tension
Too awful to mention.
(Want closure?

Original comic here.

Wednesday, 9 February 2011

Comic 858 - Milk

There once was a woman from Yonkers
Who had psychic powers and big honkers.
When men came to court
Every prurient thought
Was read back to them, driving them bonkers.

Original comic here.

Monday, 7 February 2011

Comic 857 - Archimedes

In the words of the great Archimedes
Even the weaklings and weedies
Can ask, if they're clever,
For fulcrum and lever
Or start killing hostages, speedies.

Original comic here.

Friday, 4 February 2011

Classic comic 15 - Just Alerting You

There once was an old man of Grange
Who warned people that he was strange.
This message he'd chorus
From his brontosaurus
Which carried him all about Grange.

Original comic here.

Comic 856 - Trochee Fixation

There once was a girl from Milwaukee
Who lived for the Internet trochee.
So "Ninja!" or "Pirate!"
She'd burble 'til, irate,
They silenced that girl from Milwaukee.

Original comic here.

Fittingly enough, "irate" itself becomes a trochee for the duration of this limerick.

Wednesday, 2 February 2011

Comic 855 - 1999

Before all this Facebooking guff
There was a site based around stuff.
Despite great potential
Its profit eventual
Was nil - they thought circles enough.

Original comic here.

A stab in the dark, I'm afraid.